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SAHM of 3 wonderful kids, one brilliant one Asperger Syndrome. This is not a living shrine to his disorder, but rather a place to share & discuss the different challenges that came with it and other things about parenting & life in general.

Thursday, July 7, 2011

Lessons on Social Skills...with Facebook & other social media

The other day, I was dropping off my aspie to summer school when he received a call. Since I was driving, I couldn't hear anything. He quickly hung up. But the confusion on his face was evident. There was no time for a discussion so I dropped him off.

I casually asked him when he came home. It was about Facebook. I immediately remembered his counselor saying that facebook made her job harder than it already was. He told me that Girl A was posting something on Facebook about Girl B. Girl B called my aspie to talk about it. Anyway, it was another drama which could be something or nothing. But it did set off some alarms in my mind.

This made me question why I was letting him do facebook in the first place. It's bad enough that he has difficulties with social skills, now he had to take on a whole new task of interacting online. Even I have difficulties reading between the lines during online discussions or tweeting.

We had a good talk about what was appropriate and not. And I just made it a little simpler to be a gentlemen online as he is in person. I also said he is a good friend for listening, but to avoid the landmind of repeating things that were told to him. I had other advice too.

At the end, the use of social media is one topic that will always remain in our discussions and he still has his facebook account that I monitor time to time.  I just hope I'm doing the right thing. 


  1. Facebook is a tough one, I have friends w/ teens who have FB accounts and I think I'll never let my babe be on FB ... But then when he's a teen there will be something else. Just keep monitoring & talking to him ...

  2. My 15 yr-old Aspie is on FB. We have had some issues. I do monitor his account. He can get really offended when other teens have said thing when they may be just kidding around, but he takes everything very personally. Then he started to get upset because people didn't chat him. He finally got mad and deleted all of the "fake friends" as he called them. He now has mostly family, extended family friends, and a few "real" friends.

    I think it's good for them to have it...you just have to monitor it closely. We set up rules like "No cursing...no threatening anyone!" Oh yeah...good times!

  3. Karen,
    I understand exactly regarding issues. I had to point it out all the time about what is appropriate and not. We can only do so much. He knows exactly what is not allowed and legal/illegal period. Also said I would friend him if he couldn't show me.
    Love rules. I live for rules!
    Thanks for your comment.